28 July 2009

I AM SENTIMENTAL.

It's a fact.

I don't know if I've always been this way...

No, actually, I'm pretty sure I've always been this way. There's a photo in my head (that I would scan and post if it was in a chronologically-organized album on a shelf in the next room, but it's most certainly NOT): I'm standing in front of the old maroon minivan on the last day of 6th grade with a little one at my feet and papers in hand. I'm not smiling. On purpose, because I was feeling quite melancholy about leaving my beloved Timpanogos Elementary. I remember yearning to move on and at the same time hating the prospect of this change. My solution was that I'd stay at Timpanogos and they'd simply teach me a 7th grade curriculum. Simple! But even though I felt so strongly, I wasn't very emotional about it -- my mom remembers with me that I thought it was silly for the 6th grade girls to sit in the reading room and cry about it. But I was sincerely in pain for the rite of passage. And I have felt this way about many, many experiences since.

Most recently,
about my time in our first apartment. I really wanted this place. Tiny, yes, but so much better-feeling than the others we looked at. I felt so strongly about it that even AFTER we were selected from a pile of potential renters to move into a different place, and AFTER we signed the contract, and AFTER we paid the hefty deposit, I STILL tried for this place. And I'm glad we did. It has been tiny, but welcoming. Everything fit, even the corner couch.

Our busy college lives didn't allow for nearly as much neighborhood/ward interaction as this past summer did. And I fell in love. I love our crazy L-shaped chapel around our fence. I love the historic houses everywhere. I love the families that have been here forever, and the families in the "prime" of child-rearing, and the many newly-weds and babies. I enjoyed my nursery time, and even more enjoyed my month of Young Women time. Amazing people live here, folks. And I am sad to see this go.

But,

I know there is more to love where we are going. (Like an extra room, washer, dryer and dishwasher for starters...) I'm not sad for what is coming, but I am sad about what we're leaving. This isn't the first time and I know it won't be the last time I feel this way. I guess it's all part of the grand scheme of things. I'm glad other people feel it too.

*Pictures of what we're leaving to come soon...*

8 comments:

Josie Jo said...

It's so interesting that you are so very very practical and yet so able to be sentimental too. How do you do it!? I totally missed that practical boat! Granted, I didn't cry when I left elementary school, but we both know how emotional I am. I keep the most random things. You can be so practical about being sentimental too. How? Things like THAT make me look up to you.

jayniemoon said...

I am so flattered.

I've always liked you Olivia.

Kurt Knudsen said...

It's good to be sad about leaving a place. Means you loved it and the people.
Waiting for the pics.

Rebecca said...

I know. When we moved from our house on Ash Avenue I was 15 years old. It was time to go and they couldn't find me. I was upstairs crying in my bedroom, not wanting to leave. It wasn't really a very nice house. I feel sad when we sell cars, too.

Erin said...

I am exactly the same. Our first apartment was at Wymount, and we only lived there for 4 months because I didn't like it. But the last few weeks we lived there were so sad to me.

We're moving again in a few weeks, and I'm heartbroken. You put it very well, that you're not sad for what's coming, just for what you're leaving behind.

And your 6th grade story reminded me of my 16th birthday. I dropped my dad off at work, then drove to Provo High all by myself, because I had a license, and I cried the whole way. Because I didn't want to be grown up, it was too much.

Anyway, I do like you. Also, my little sister is getting married and Ashley Thalman is her photographer. Your wedding inspired that choice.

Jane Hudd said...

I love the background information. Hearing the story behind the story makes a story so much better. :) I must be sentimental too. :) Actually I know I'm sentimental & that's why I have ALWAYS loved your collections of things & the way you give your heart away. You always share yourself openly & honestly & in depth. I love that about you. I also love your drawings & journals. I'm jealous of them most of the time, but I still love them.

Jessica Womble said...

You know it's never easy moving on with your life. But we all have too. We are moving next Saturday and I couldn't agree with you more. Good luck with everything.

Cherie said...

OK - since your Papá is clearly NOT sentimental about pretty much anything and pretty much perceives that as one of his many positive traits ;)-- we'd probably be safe to assume that possibly some of your sentimentality may have come from me!
But of course, i'm too veclempt at the moment to say for sure... SO many memories!

WEDDING DAY PHOTOS BY MY COUSIN JORDAN JUAREZ